• Why are cats such good singers? Because they're very mewsical.
• Why is it so hard for a leopard to hide? Because he's always spotted.
• Why did the cat run from the tree? Because it was afraid of the bark!
• Why is the cat so grouchy? Because he's in a bad mewd.
• Why is a cat's song funny? Because it's always a-mewwww-sing.
• Why is a thirsty cat like a track runner? He keeps going back for one more lap.
• Why did the cat put oil on the mouse? Because it squeaked.
• Why did the judge dismiss the entire jury made up of cats? Because each of them was guilty of purrjury.
• Why do cats eat fur balls? Because they love a good gag!
• Why are cats better than babies? Because you only have to change a litter box once a day.
• Why do cats make terrible story tellers? They only have one tail.
• Why don't cats play poker in the jungle? Too many cheetahs.
• Why do you always find the cat in the last place you look? Because you stop looking after you find it.
• Why does everyone love cats? They're purr-fect!
• Did you hear about the cat who drank 5 bowls of water? He set a new lap record.
• Did you hear about the cat who swallowed a ball of wool? She had mittens.
• Where does a cat go when it loses its tail? The retail store.
• Where is one place that your cat can sit, but you can't? Your lap.
• When is it hard to hear a cat? When it speaks in whiskers.
• If lights run on electricity and cars run on petrol, what do cats run on? Their paws.
• How does the cat get its own way? With friendly purrsuasion.
• How do cats end a fight? They hiss and make up.
• How do cats eat spaghetti? The same as everyone else - they put it in their mouths!
• How do you know if you cat's got a bad cold? He has cat-arrh!
• How do you know if your cat has eaten a duckling? She's got that down in the mouth look!
• How do cats buy things? From a cat-alogue!
• How many cats can you put into an empty box? Only one. After that, the box isn't empty.
• Do cats like Mother Goose? Yes, but they prefer furry tails.
• Can a cat beat a lion? No, but it can always lick itself.

• What does the lion say to his friends before they go out hunting for food ? 'Let us prey.'

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